16 Weeks

How far along? 16 weeks
Total weight gain/loss: 2lbs
Maternity clothes? All the time.  Though I definitely need to do more shopping.  Being pregnant at two different times of the year means I need to go shopping...so my wardrobe is a little limited these days.
Sleep: Still exhausted all the time and really hoping it gets better soon.
Best moment this week: Another good checkup & hearing the baby's heartbeat.
Food cravings: Nothing in particular.  Fattening foods sound good to me a lot lately, but I'm trying to be smarter about my food habits this time around.
Gender: TBD - but, stay tuned...
Labor Signs: No.
What I miss: Sometimes after a stressful day...a glass of wine.  But, that's one that I can get over missing.
What I am looking forward to: Getting more energy.  And finding out if it's a boy or girl!
Milestones: Feeling the baby.  I've been feeling movement for a few weeks, but it's been really nice to remember that there's a little one in there!
Differences between 1 & 2:  This is probably obvious to those who read the blog.  But I haven't been tracking this pregnancy or as involved in it as I was with Brody.  It's obviously just the beginning of many differences with a second child, but I can't already help feeling guilty.  It's been a little more difficult for me to connect with this baby than I did with Brody.  All I had to worry about with Brody was him and Jason.  I could focus on taking care of myself and thinking about the baby.  Now, taking care of a 2 year old, while pregnant doesn't give me that luxury.  I know it's typical, but definitely a difference from last time.

Why it's so much harder the second time

If I'm going to be honest (which I really try to do on this blog, but sometimes am not as blunt as I could be), this pregnancy is 10x harder for me than the first.

For starters, this little man...

...is definitely going through an interesting phase right now. I use the word interesting, because even though I want to use a much harsher word at this point in our lives, I know it's not really that bad. But, let's face it, I'm stubborn and can be sassy. Jason? Well he's definitely stubborn, and strong-willed. So the fact that our sweet adorable little son would be stubborn? Strong-willed? Shouldn't be a surprise!!

Brody is at a stage where he can verbalize what he wants, but isn't old enough to understand that sometimes you just don't get what you want. This ensues with a lot of arguments about what to eat, how late he can stay up, whether or not he can watch tv...etc. Then there is the utter defiance when he doesn't get what he wants. He doesn't know how to show frusteration, so there is a lot of screaming in our faces and every once and awhile, hitting.

All of this is hard enough for any parent to deal with (it's just a phase though, right?!?), then add pregnancy stress, nausea and exhaustion on top of it? It definitely doesn't help.

Which brings me to how my second child is treating me (not that I can blame a baby in utero). But my nausea has been much worse with this little one and the exhaustion is probably the same, but much harder to manage with a two-year old to take care of.

Then...if all of this didn't make it a more difficult pregnancy...

I started a new job (same company, new position). Yes, this was a very good thing for me and my career. It was totally the right thing, and I am very excited/happy about it. But good stress is still stress. Learning something new, taking on a young (experience-wise) team and trying to improve things requires a lot of time and effort.

Then on top of everything else, Jason is going through a lot of turnover at his work, which with his lovely title of VP, makes him responsible for picking up the slack. Which makes him just as tired and stressed at the end of the day as I am (well I've got the baby-making thing tiring me out, so maybe he's not quite as tired as I am...)

Of course add all of this up and I realize that I haven't focused on baby#2 very much. When you're pregnant with your first, it's all you can think about and so much of your focus. So when I realize I'm already 16 weeks pregnant and time is flying by, I feel bad that I am not as connected to this baby as I was to Brody.

Things were so much easier the first time around. Don't even remind me how much harder having two children to look after is going to be!!

Cute Things Toddlers Do

I love writing about the cute things Brody does. He's obviously not different from every other two year old, they all have their cute moments. My theory, is that if I keep track of them, they're great to look back on when he's driving me crazy and remind me how sweet and innocent he is.

We tried teaching Brody to give "bear-hugs." We got him to squeeze us tightly, but then he started "roaring." Because clearly, to give a bear-hug, you have to roar like a bear! Then, the next time I asked him to give me a bear-hug, he said, "no!" Saddened by this, I asked why not, he said "no, cat-hug", me, clearly confused, sat there while he wrapped his arms around me and meow-ed while giving me a hug.

What you didn't know there was such thing as a cat-hug? Me neither, but it's just as sweet as every other hug...and much more hilarious.

Labor Prediction

With Brody I came across a website that predicts your labor experience. Here was Brody's prediction:
"The day you deliver, outside will be dark. Your baby will arrive in the
middle of the night. After a labor lasting approximately 14 hours, your child, a
boy, will be born. Your baby will weigh about 15 pounds, 12 ounces, and will be
20-1/2 inches long. This child will have medium gray eyes and barely there
auburn hair. "

**He was only 8lbs 14oz, 21 1/2 inches, labor was more like 36 hours all in, but was 16 hours at the hospital, in the middle of hte afternoon. He had dark hair and blue eyes... so all in, totally incorrect!

But for fun, I did it again!

Baby#2:

The day you deliver, outside will be windy. Your baby will arrive in the late afternoon. After a labor lasting approximately 9 hours, your child, a girl, will be born. Your baby will weigh about 5 pounds, 6 ounces, and will be 17 inches long. This child will have medium brown eyes and curly blonde hair.

This one is a lot more believeable than last time. And I like the "girl" prediction. But I'm not holding my breath. Curly hair? Not likely, blonde, maybe. Brown eyes? Probably not. 5lbs 6oz after having an almost 9lb baby? Again, not likely. But you never know! I will take the 9 hour labor though...

Pregnancy #2 is going to be very different

Doctor Visits

January 26th

First appointment was with a nurse to confirm pregnancy, take blood and go over any questions / give me the what to do / not to do while pregnant.

All in all pretty eventful. She confirmed that the pregnancy test was positive - but I assumed that their test was pretty consistent with the million I took at home.

February 9th

First appointment with the OB. Sadly, the OB that delivered Brody (who we loved!) died of cancer before Brody turned 1. So, this was only my second appointment with my new doctor from the same office. It was interesting to see how his views were going to be different than my last doctor.

Luckily, I got to skip some of the not-so-fun stuff, since I was just in the office last summer. He wasn't worried about waiting until after birth to do the routine annual exam. All he did was check to make sure everything was growing on schedule

He brought a doppler in to listen to the heartbeat, but said right away, that it will be hard to hear one at 8 weeks. He said he'd probably bring me back in 2 weeks to try again to listen to it. I was instantly dissapointed. I had a bad dream this week that I miscarried the baby, and for some reason have been extrememly more paranoid with this one than with Brody.

Then...he said something like, or we could pop-in for a quick ultrasound to make sure everything is okay. Yes please!! Jason told him that I was being a worry-wart and that an ultrasound would probably make me feel a lot better, commenting that I was having bad dreams about the baby.

Once he realized that my uterus is tipped backwards (happened after Brody was born, doesn't really affect anything), he knew that he'd never hear the heartbeat with a doppler. Obviously the baby is positioned further away, making it harder to hear anything. So he didn't even try. He just said, let's go see if the ultrasound is available. Yay!!

He found the baby very quickly with the wand and we instantly saw a little flicker. That was the heartbeat. He looked around for awhile, showing us the forming umbilical cord, did a 3D image of our little peanut and double checked to make sure there was only 1 in there (whew!).

Apparently I ovulated from my left ovary (I find this interesting for some reason) and there was a weird speck of something near the baby (but not on it). Doc said it was nothing to worry about, just something to note at this point and time. Said it will probably go away, but didn't say much else about it. Luckily, we'll be going back for another one in 4 weeks, so we'll get to make sure everything is still on track.

Introducing, our little peanut...

Weeks 5-7

Weekly checklist:
How far along? 7 weeks
Total weight gain/loss: 0
Maternity clothes? Seriously, I can't keep my pants buttoned. Okay, I can, but then it digs into my stomach and makes me even more sick than I already feel. Instead, I'm using a hair tie around my buttons or the Be Band to keep my pants up.
Sleep: Exhausted, but our trip to FL allowed me to sleep in A LOT. It was amazing and much needed.
Best moment these weeks: Telling a couple ladies the big secret.
Food cravings: More like aversions. Something sounds good, then I don't want to eat it. Sometimes while I'm eating it, it no longer tastes good. Is it second tri yet?
Gender: TBD - For the record, Jay has officially declared that it is a girl. Despite the fact that I am much sicker than with Brody (which would be just typical of a little-diva inside me), I do seriously think it will be another boy. Which is totally fine with me, since I clearly have an amazing little boy at home and know that we'd create another just-as-awesome little man.
Labor Signs: No.
What I miss: Feeling normal. Did I mention that morning sickness is in full swing? Oh and that it's not just morning, but noon, night, middle of the night. It's really awesome.
What I am looking forward to: 8 week appointment next week!
Milestones: 1st appointment (with the nurse, not the OB).

Week 4

Last pregnancy, I didn't start weekly check-ins until second trimester. This time, I am starting them early to allow myself to blog about it before I can actually tell anyone! I'm posting the entries after we've announced, obviously, but it's a good look back at the early weeks.

Weekly checklist:
How far along? 4 weeks
Total weight gain/loss: +0 (I thought I gained a 1lb already, but was back down today, whew!)
Maternity clothes? Not for awhile, hopefully!
Sleep: Definitely getting tired already. I am not sure if it is because I cut down on caffeine significantly or because of the baby.
Best moment this week: Postive pregnancy test!
Food cravings: none, but I am hungrier already.
Gender: Here is what I wrote in my first check-in with Brody: "Won't know for awhile...but figure with Jason's family history, it's probably a boy!" I was right with Brody. This time, while it will be fun to have a girl, I know how much fun having a little man is, so I know it will be great either way!
Labor Signs: Hopefully none for a long time!
What I miss: Caffiene. No soda since the stick turned pink and cut down to 1 regular coffee a day or half caf espresso. Ideally, I'd cut it out completely, but I just don't know if I am capable.
What I am looking forward to: First OB appointment / first ultrasound. I'm hoping to get to see a gummy bear again around 8ish weeks!
Weekly Wisdom: I'm one very very lucky girl. While it's still too early to shout from the rooftops, I am so excited that we have another one on the way. I'm very very lucky that we didn't have to wait a long time with either pregnancies and I know that.
Milestones: Kicking off the beginning of a wonderfully long journey.

And History Repeats Itself

January 10, 2012
How we found out #2 was on the way:

A little background:
When we decided to have Brody, it only took us 2 months to conceive. So of course I had really high expectations with this one and was trying very hard to not to get my hopes up. However, after one month of trying, I of course was a little sad when we weren't successful.

The second month we were trying I realized how selfishly I wanted this to be the month. I'll list them out later, but there are a ton of reasons a Sept baby would be awesome for us. So of course I started getting my hopes up.

Knowing I could be in for the long run, I bought a pack of home pregnancy tests online for super cheap. My theory was that since they were so cheap, it wouldn't be a problem if I tested multiple times.

The days leading up:
About 5 days before my period, I took a test. I didn't even tell Jason because I was pretty sure it would be negative. However, we were going out with friends that night and I figured that if I knew for sure, it would be great.

Of course it was negative. I was still dissapointed and did end up telling Jason later that it was negative. The test strips were supposed to be very sensitive, so I was feeling pretty confident that this probably wasn't the month. Just in case though, I only had a little over 1 glass of wine. (In retrospect, I wonder if I should have abstained completely...oh well)

And here we go again:
2 days before my period I had a dream that I took a test and it was positive. Crazy right?? I woke up after the dream to cramps. It felt like my period was on it's way. Again, dissapointment.

However, I found out we were pregnant with Brody on the same cycle day, so I tested anyway.

First test: very very faint pink line that showed up after the full 5 minute testing time. (Me: This can't be right??)

Second test: Immediately took another one (remember these were cheap!). Faint, but a little more clear. But...a line is a line...right????

Showed them to Jason but we were cautiously excited. Tossed them in the garbage. Went to work - googled - said a line is a line no matter how faint. Now I was really getting excited.

Picked up a digital test on my way home that night....Took it and yep - Pregnant!!!
I handed Brody the test (with the plastic cover over it) and told him to take it to Daddy. What does he do? He takes the cover off of the part that has my pee on it and starts to rub it on his arm. He then sticks it in his hair next. (This kid is crazy).

Meanwhile, I'm quickly trying to grab it away from him! Jason has no idea what is going on, so I just put the cover back on, throw the test at him and went to wash Brody up.

Then it finally clicks what he's looking at and he gets very excited.

Same amount of cycles, postive test on the same day...sometimes it's good when history repeats itself!

Brody has an announcement...

Baby #2 is on it's way!!

The way a toddler thinks...

I constantly crack-up at the things Brody says to me. I've posted about how random a conversation can be with him. But even more, these conversations really make me think about how weird his brain works.

I believe most of Brody's frustrations these days, is because he really doesn't understand certain things. Take yesterday's discussion:

Walking through daycare parking lot:

B: Blue one, Mama!
M: Yes, there is a blue car, good job!
B: Drive Blue one.
M: Silly, that's not our car! We have a brown car.
B: No Mama, blue one!
M: Brody, I can't just drive someone else's car. See, look at Mama's keys, they work for our Brown car.

Of course he was still upset we didn't get to drive the blue car, and I still don't think he gets why we can't just pick any car out of the parking lot and drive it home.

Then on the way home, he proceeded to tell me about the boogers in his nose, how he wanted eggs plus hot dogs for dinner and told me I drive too fast. He seriously makes me laugh.

Every.single.day.

We Like to Party!

It did in fact happen, Brody turned 2! It happened over a month ago, yet, the blog stayed silent. I'm not the most consistent blogger in the world!

So...Brody turns 2 (holy crap!) and we throw a party!

On Brody's actual birthday, I had big plans. I took off work all day, but sent Brody to daycare. I planned to bake/food prep for the party all day, until Brody woke up from his nap. Then I was going to pick him up from daycare, take him to a kids indoor playground and we were going to go out for dinner. But, we live in Wisconsin. And it snowed. And snowed. Most of the day. Jason and I decided to just have Jay pick Brody up from daycare at the normal time and that it didn't make sense for more driving in the snow than necessary. We even stayed in for dinner. I was bummed we couldn't do something more special, but I know Brody didn't care. He was just excited that there were balloons in the house that he could play with.

The next day was the big party. For almost a month beforehand, we told Brody that he was having an "Elmo Birthday Party." It was really fun having him actually understand what a birthday party was and get excited for it. So his next big excitement was that he was going to "eat Elmo." Which was hilarious. I practiced making his birthday cake ahead of time because I was afraid I'd screw it up (I work with numbers for a living, I'm not very creative) so he knew what the Elmo cake looked like. I wouldn't let him eat the practice one, so he was very excited to "eat Elmo."

The Elmo/Seasame Theme Invite:

Here are some of the decorations:

I made an Elmo cake

Elmo veggie tray

Elmo books and toys as centerpieces

I also made red cake pops as party favors (can NOT believe I forgot to take a picture of them) and we ordered Elmo cupcakes from a local bakery. Brody wore an Elmo shirt with the #2 on it (found on etsy.com)

Brody doesn't quite know how to blow out a candle yet, so his friend Aubrie (she's 3 months older, so clearly much wiser) had to show him how it's done. (Also can NOT believe I don't have a picture of this, she was too cute!!)

He does have eating the cupcake down though!
We ended up with 35ish guests, which was amazing. A ton of our friends were able to make it, and considering many of them don't have kids yet, not to mention 2 year old birthday parties aren't even that exciting when you do have kids, we were very greatful they came. It's always good to get so many people we love in one place!

I'm a Working Mom

There is one thing I've stayed completely away from in this blog: politics. I'd like to continue to do so. However, there has been a little bit in the news lately about working mothers thanks to a certain presidential candidate.

Bottom line, there were two major views quoted from a book he wrote many years ago. My paraphrasing:

1. Providing things for your children is just a convenient excuse for pursuing a gratifying career outside the home

2. Working moms who want to work have been brainwashed by Radical Feminists

Regardless of whether this particular candidate truly believes these things, I am fairly certain there are many people out there who don't understand working moms. Of course all of this caused me to reflect on my reasoning for being a working mom. But first I'm going to quickly say what I think about the views stated above:

1. This is the dumbest thing I've ever heard. First, I know many working mothers who would love to stay at home but it isn't financially feasible. They aren't making excuses, it's just reality. And what about single moms? How on earth can they support their family without working?

2. Ah, here we go. I'm actually one of those working moms who want to work. Gasp!! Clearly I've been brainwashed.

Okay, moving on...

Here's why I am not only okay with being a working mom, but I actually prefer it.

I LOVE my son. If you know me, you know this is a fact. Jason and Brody are my whole world and I will do anything to make them happy and thrive. I do actually believe that working outside the home is better for Brody.

Brody goes to a GREAT daycare. Do I disagree with what they do from time to time? Sure. Does he learn a ton more than I could ever teach him? Most definitely. After turning 1 he quickly started coming home with paint on his shirts. After I got over how messy he looked, it clicked...wait? 1-year- olds can paint?? Ha! I would have never given him this learning opportunity so early. Who would have thought that sensory tables were great for babies and toddlers? I would have never thought to do that at home, too messy! I'll counter-argue this and say that if I stayed home with Brody I would likely educate myself much better and do everything I could to teach him all that he learns at daycare. But, it's not natural for me, and I'm so happy he gets the opportunity to do so many different things.

I'm happier. I love my job (most days), it makes me feel good to do something I'm good at. I like the interaction with my co-workers and I like the opportunity for advancement. I've moved up several times in my career and I love it every time. This may make me selfish, but I'd rather Brody have a happy mommy than a cranky mommy.

I like providing for my family. The careers Jason and I have established allow us to do a lot of things over the last 5 1/2 years. I like that we can do that. If we weren't both working, we could make many easy choices to make it work, but I like it that when we aren't working we can do so many things we love (like travel) without having to think twice. Brody has been able to experience a lot in two short years and we hope to keep providing this for him.

The biggest reason it works for us?

Jason.

Hands-down. I couldn't have the career I have without him. He picks up Brody most nights at a much earlier hour than I would be able to. He makes dinner every.single.night. He's awesome. And a much better cook than me! He's also an amazing father. And at the end of the day, he supports me in everything I do.

Another thing, I love that we don't fit the traditional family stereotypes. From day one Jason was as much involved in caring for and raising Brody as I was. It's not a duty that only falls on mothers anymore. Maybe men are getting screwed in this modern approach to parenting (like actually having to get up in the middle of the night or change gross diapers). But I'd like to think that by doing my share financially, I've also reduced the burden that husbands typically feel. We provide for our family together just as we care for our family together.

If I'm being honest (and luckily Jason doesn't read this blog very often), there are many days where he does more than I do. Some of that is because I work longer (so I have less hours at home), and some of it is because he's super awesome. But there's one thing we've never done in our marriage. We don't keep score. It all evens out over time.

We have a 2 year old

Clearly I'm a bit behind in blogging. Things have been busy around our house this year, including two trips to Orlando over 10 days for me. We've also been getting over colds, ear infections and random fevers.

Birthday update will be done soon, but it has come and gone, Brody is officially two! And he's bringing in the year in style.

Terrible Two Style.

I don't know what happened to my sweet, endearing little boy!! Okay, he's always been a little crazy, but not so dramatic! I'm trying to take it a day at a time and approach from the "this too will pass" mentality. But that little man sure knows how to push my buttons.

His language is great these days. He's really doing a good job communicating and it's nice to know what he wants most of the time. Of course, with his ability to tell us what he wants, comes with demands:

-Brody sit in chair. Mama, couch!
-Mama eat breakfast.
-Brody no nap! Toys!
-More books Mama! (After reading 5 million before bed) Then...More songs Mama! (I secretly love this one because there is a day that will come where he realizes I'm not that good of a singer)
-Watch Guppies!

Most of these "requests" I'll happily do for him. Some I have to put my foot down (bedtime stall tactics). Others, I just cannot allow...and this is where the temper tantrums come in.
Recent examples:

1. Biggest fight ever about having cookies for dinner. Brody saw cookies on the counter and decided that is what he wanted for dinner. For starters, he very very rarely eats any desserts and definitely not cookies. So cookies for dinner?? Out of the question. The obvious compromise (if you eat your dinner you can have cookies for dessert), didn't work.

Result: 30 minutes of temper tantrums, crying, screaming, 1 unsuccessful time-out, a few tears on my part...and he finally gave in, ate his dinner and had cookies for dessert.

2. Marshmallows with dinner. We don't even have marshmallows in the house! Apparently he's been getting them at school for good behavior (will post about my opinions on this another time) and came home expecting the same thing.

Result: A few whines/cries, distraction with another food he liked, eventually forgotten about. Whew, crisis averted!

3. "Red Car Mama!!" -- Um, well, sure it would be great to drive the red car today, but your father already left with that car, and the brown car is the only choice we have. Oh and he said this after we were already a block away from the house! Where does he come up with this stuff?

This one is also right up there with his demands to drive. He's asked several times if he can drive. Luckily he had a toy steering wheel we keep in the car so he can pretend. I'm sure this won't be the last time we get this request between now and 16.

Bring on 2012!

Alright, everyone is doing it (except my husband)...

It's resolution time!!

So let's start with how I did on my 2011 resolutions.

-Organizing. I made great strides, but this is a continual effort.
-Losing weight. Happy to report that I lost about 10 lbs in 2011, but I still have about 10 to go to be at a reasonable weight (in my eyes).
-Spending life living in the moment. I'm happy on the progress I made on this one last year. As I blogged, 2o11 was spent with a lot of family travel time. There was the slight hiccup of August where I dissapeared for about 6 weeks, working way too many crazy hours. But I think i've recovered from it pretty well and tried to make up for it when I can.

Now onto 2012 resolutions:

-Get in shape. I like this better than "losing weight" because at the end of the day, I don't care how much I weigh if I am healthier and more physically in shape. My sister is helping me with this resolution and we start preparing for a 5K in March. I have to blog, facebook, whatever I can about it, so that I get enough peer-pressure to make me stick to it. Honestly, I used to love running, so getting back into it will be really good for me. And then, obviously the weight will come with it.

-Continue to organize. I still have opportunities here and with all the stuff we keep accumulating with Brody, we need to find a better way to organize. We also plan to have more children, someday. (Not committing to when or how many for those grandparents out there reading this). But along with future child/children comes more stuff! Ugh, I groan just thinking about it.

-Home improvements. Starting with little things like curtains, hanging more pictures, organizing. Then moving to bigger stuff, re-tiling our bathroom, painting, landscaping. I often dream about buying a new house, but clearly the cheaper option is making the house I already own more loveable. So that is what we're going to do.

Happy 2012 to everyone & help keep me honest on my goals!!