40 Weeks

39 weeks 5 days

 

The weekly update I never really want to write.  But Aedan's due date has come and gone.  Honestly, from the beginning I never expected him to come early.  Brody was 5 days late, so I didn't think Aedan would be here sooner.  I'm glad I haven't felt ready for the last 4 weeks like I was the first time.  It made for less "waiting" time.

 

40 weeks

 

Total weight gain/loss: Up a couple pounds this week, 29 in total.

Maternity clothes:  Sweatpants and tank-tops from here on out!

Sleep: I've been up with contractions almost nightly for the last week.  So sleep has been a luxury when it comes.  Of course the contractions stop and aparently aren't actually doing anything.  So I'm just sleep unnecessarily sleep-deprived at this point.  But it's all part of the process right?

Best moment this week: Last day at work!  My mind wasn't working that well on 4 hours of sleep, so it's best for everyone that I'm done. 

Food cravings: Custard...but since I'm not eating it, I've just substituted it with other desserts.

Labor Signs: Lots of random contractions, but nothing that means anything.

What I miss: My body.  It takes me like 5 minutes to roll over in bed, I can't fit in tight spaces and my lap is nonexistent for my toddler to cuddle with.

What I am looking forward to: Baby snuggles

Milestones: Due-date!
Differences between 1&2: Everything.  Instead of laying around pampering myself the last couple of weeks of pregnancy, it's been about making sure Brody feels loved and secure.  It's actually been great because he helps keep my mind off the waiting.  And this time, instead of pampering me by doing things for me, Jason takes care of me by taking care of Brody more.  He lets me nap when Brody naps, sleep-in when I need to and do the heavy-lifting (literally) when we're out with Brody. 

Why it's so much harder the second time

If I'm going to be honest (which I really try to do on this blog, but sometimes am not as blunt as I could be), this pregnancy is 10x harder for me than the first.

For starters, this little man...

...is definitely going through an interesting phase right now. I use the word interesting, because even though I want to use a much harsher word at this point in our lives, I know it's not really that bad. But, let's face it, I'm stubborn and can be sassy. Jason? Well he's definitely stubborn, and strong-willed. So the fact that our sweet adorable little son would be stubborn? Strong-willed? Shouldn't be a surprise!!

Brody is at a stage where he can verbalize what he wants, but isn't old enough to understand that sometimes you just don't get what you want. This ensues with a lot of arguments about what to eat, how late he can stay up, whether or not he can watch tv...etc. Then there is the utter defiance when he doesn't get what he wants. He doesn't know how to show frusteration, so there is a lot of screaming in our faces and every once and awhile, hitting.

All of this is hard enough for any parent to deal with (it's just a phase though, right?!?), then add pregnancy stress, nausea and exhaustion on top of it? It definitely doesn't help.

Which brings me to how my second child is treating me (not that I can blame a baby in utero). But my nausea has been much worse with this little one and the exhaustion is probably the same, but much harder to manage with a two-year old to take care of.

Then...if all of this didn't make it a more difficult pregnancy...

I started a new job (same company, new position). Yes, this was a very good thing for me and my career. It was totally the right thing, and I am very excited/happy about it. But good stress is still stress. Learning something new, taking on a young (experience-wise) team and trying to improve things requires a lot of time and effort.

Then on top of everything else, Jason is going through a lot of turnover at his work, which with his lovely title of VP, makes him responsible for picking up the slack. Which makes him just as tired and stressed at the end of the day as I am (well I've got the baby-making thing tiring me out, so maybe he's not quite as tired as I am...)

Of course add all of this up and I realize that I haven't focused on baby#2 very much. When you're pregnant with your first, it's all you can think about and so much of your focus. So when I realize I'm already 16 weeks pregnant and time is flying by, I feel bad that I am not as connected to this baby as I was to Brody.

Things were so much easier the first time around. Don't even remind me how much harder having two children to look after is going to be!!

I'm a Working Mom

There is one thing I've stayed completely away from in this blog: politics. I'd like to continue to do so. However, there has been a little bit in the news lately about working mothers thanks to a certain presidential candidate.

Bottom line, there were two major views quoted from a book he wrote many years ago. My paraphrasing:

1. Providing things for your children is just a convenient excuse for pursuing a gratifying career outside the home

2. Working moms who want to work have been brainwashed by Radical Feminists

Regardless of whether this particular candidate truly believes these things, I am fairly certain there are many people out there who don't understand working moms. Of course all of this caused me to reflect on my reasoning for being a working mom. But first I'm going to quickly say what I think about the views stated above:

1. This is the dumbest thing I've ever heard. First, I know many working mothers who would love to stay at home but it isn't financially feasible. They aren't making excuses, it's just reality. And what about single moms? How on earth can they support their family without working?

2. Ah, here we go. I'm actually one of those working moms who want to work. Gasp!! Clearly I've been brainwashed.

Okay, moving on...

Here's why I am not only okay with being a working mom, but I actually prefer it.

I LOVE my son. If you know me, you know this is a fact. Jason and Brody are my whole world and I will do anything to make them happy and thrive. I do actually believe that working outside the home is better for Brody.

Brody goes to a GREAT daycare. Do I disagree with what they do from time to time? Sure. Does he learn a ton more than I could ever teach him? Most definitely. After turning 1 he quickly started coming home with paint on his shirts. After I got over how messy he looked, it clicked...wait? 1-year- olds can paint?? Ha! I would have never given him this learning opportunity so early. Who would have thought that sensory tables were great for babies and toddlers? I would have never thought to do that at home, too messy! I'll counter-argue this and say that if I stayed home with Brody I would likely educate myself much better and do everything I could to teach him all that he learns at daycare. But, it's not natural for me, and I'm so happy he gets the opportunity to do so many different things.

I'm happier. I love my job (most days), it makes me feel good to do something I'm good at. I like the interaction with my co-workers and I like the opportunity for advancement. I've moved up several times in my career and I love it every time. This may make me selfish, but I'd rather Brody have a happy mommy than a cranky mommy.

I like providing for my family. The careers Jason and I have established allow us to do a lot of things over the last 5 1/2 years. I like that we can do that. If we weren't both working, we could make many easy choices to make it work, but I like it that when we aren't working we can do so many things we love (like travel) without having to think twice. Brody has been able to experience a lot in two short years and we hope to keep providing this for him.

The biggest reason it works for us?

Jason.

Hands-down. I couldn't have the career I have without him. He picks up Brody most nights at a much earlier hour than I would be able to. He makes dinner every.single.night. He's awesome. And a much better cook than me! He's also an amazing father. And at the end of the day, he supports me in everything I do.

Another thing, I love that we don't fit the traditional family stereotypes. From day one Jason was as much involved in caring for and raising Brody as I was. It's not a duty that only falls on mothers anymore. Maybe men are getting screwed in this modern approach to parenting (like actually having to get up in the middle of the night or change gross diapers). But I'd like to think that by doing my share financially, I've also reduced the burden that husbands typically feel. We provide for our family together just as we care for our family together.

If I'm being honest (and luckily Jason doesn't read this blog very often), there are many days where he does more than I do. Some of that is because I work longer (so I have less hours at home), and some of it is because he's super awesome. But there's one thing we've never done in our marriage. We don't keep score. It all evens out over time.

You know you're the mom of a toddler when...

When I first started working after Brody was born, it made me laugh at the stuff I had at my desk with me in my laptop bag.

Today I was reflecting on how I am so used to carrying around stuff for Brody that it doesn't phase me, but it's amazing how different life is with a toddler. A year and a half ago I blogged about having onsies, bibs etc. Check purse today:

--Toy Cars
--Pacifier (that's being hidden in a zipper so Brody won't find it)
--Hand sanitizing wipes & bottle of hand sanitizer
--iPad that Brody refers to as "Elmo" because that's what he uses it for
--Lots of advil

And on the weekends you'll find a spare diaper and wipes, sippy cup and a snack.

It's not a glamorous life, but I love it.

Working Mom Struggles

As I mentioned before, the end of our summer got a little crazy at work. For a few months I was working crazy hours. At least 6 weeks of it Jason was basically a single parent, when I never even left town! I easily thought about quiting my job daily. (OK not really since I knew it was only temporary and I love my job).

I've gone through busy periods in my career and had jobs that never seemed to not been in a busy time. Everytime that happened though, there was only one person I was leaving at home. When it was just Jason and me, he was very understanding when I had to work late. Sure I'd get the occasional complaint, but at the end of the day, he understood that I enjoyed my job and sometimes that required a lot of hours.

Ever since Brody was born, I've been in a job where we have busy times, but that really only amounted to 50 hours a week. And I've been very lucky where I can work at home at night instead of staying at the office late.

Then we had an unexpected thing come up at work (it was accounting related, so I won't bore you with the details), that not only did I have to work late and work weekends, it wasn't optional. For the first time in my career, I was told that I had to work all weekend. We were here for 15 hour days for over 10 days straight. Which = not seeing Brody for most of those days.

Things I learned:
1. There is a reason I work where I do...this was a rare situation, where other career paths I could have taken would expect this on a regular basis.

2. I'm not emotionally capable of handling being absent from my family for long periods of time. There were a lot of tears shed... (Also, working 90-100 hours in a week is exhausting)

3. I have the BEST HUSBAND IN THE WORLD! Ok, I already knew that, but, he's always been there for me when I needed it and this time was no exception. I normally take Brody to daycare every day. But in order for me to get home before 10pm at night, I had to start coming in earlier than daycare opened. So he had to go to work late a couple days a week, just so I could be in at 6am. His job is important to him too, so it wasn't easy to have to balance that as well as taking on Brody full-time.

On the weekends when I was at work, Jason didn't just sit at home with Brody staring at the TV, he actually took him out to do things. Our zoo passes were awesome because they would just head out to the zoo for a few hours and then head home when they got bored. He really is a great father.

4. We have a great family. Again, I already knew this, but we had a few people have to come and babysit last minute because I couldn't get out of work. It's a huge help having them around and knowing Jason wasn't in it alone.

5. I do really work for a great company. There were many people who had to go above and beyond this summer and they made sure to recognize everyone.

Laughing our way through Toddlerhood

It's been way too long since I've blogged. First, it was because I was working ridiculous hours...I mean "ridiculous, I haven't seen my child in 5 days" kind of hours. Then I was back to working normal hours and spending every waking minute with my son, husband, family, friends and then catching up on all the house related stuff we ignored.

Now...we're catching our breath, so it's time to blog again! Which is really a good thing, because, seriously, toddlers are funny. I mean babies are cute, sleepy and cuddly. But toddlers are really fun. They're also difficult, stubborn and stressful. But very fun.

Brody is in a stage where he freaks out if anything isn't the way he expects. Example: he likes it if you give him a cheese stick whole & he'll take bites off of it. If you break it into little pieces for him, he doesn't want it, and will literally cry about it. In his mind, it's just not the same! You learn which battles to pick and move on.

So this morning, Brody and I were walking out to the car in the garage like we do every morning. However, today, I wasn't wearing any shoes. My shoes were in the car already and I was going to put them on in the garage (my husband is probably rolling his eyes right now that I didn't at least put sandals on and now my socks are probably dirty).

And Brody, could not handle it at all. "Mama, shoes!!"

When I reassured him that they were just in the car and I could walk out to get them, he just started picking up every other pair of shoes I had by the back door.

"Mama shoes, mama shoes" as he hands me one shoe after the other. He actually refused to walk out the back door until he saw me pull my shoes out of the car and put them on.

It's times like this that you just have to laugh at how his little brain works. If you're not laughing, you're probably pulling your hair out trying to rationalize with him...so we choose to laugh.

More stories, including a catch-up on how our last 3 summer vacations went (Michigan, Green Bay, New York), coming soon!

Daycare Fun

Yesterday I got the following e-mail from daycare:

"Once again Brody was the only boy in the room. When I was putting 'prettys' in the girls' hair, Brody pulled his own hair and signed 'Please.' He even looked up at where we keep the rubber bands! With the new refined 'please' baby sign and those big blue eyes I couldn't say no..."

She also added that she told him that some football players wear ponytails too! And then said, I hope you don't mind! This type of thing doesn't bother me in the slightest, I think it's cute. With Brody's mohawk the first year of his life, it isn't the first time a teacher put his hair in a ponytail! I laughed, put the picture on my phone and forwarded it to Jason right away.

However...Jason thought Brody should have a hairstyle more like Daddy's...so here's what he looked like this morning...

I do have to say, the styled look does make my heart melt. He looks like such a big kid!

Updates

It's been over a month since I've blogged. So obviously my resolution to blog more often is failing. As for my other three resolutions, I'm 1 for 3. Organizing - I'm made good strides here: updated fridge calendar, coupon organizer, place to put bills and even organized my pictures on our computer.

As for the other two, I haven't lost any weight and a promotion at work in early January hasn't been helping my ability to be home more often. But it's early in the year and at least I'm trying to make an effort on working less & living in the moment more - I swear!

As for our adorable little toddler...

Brody continues to change in front of our eyes everyday. I think I say this about every stage, but I'm really loving all the new skills he's learning.

He's up to using 4 baby-signs to communciate with us (more, all-done, eat and please/help). The last one just recently and he's using the sign "please" but seems to use it mostly when he wants help with something. He understands the sign "drink" but doesn't use it. We, however, use it with or without the word and he understands what we want him to do.

He also understands us really well. We ask for a hug or a kiss and he's happy to share them with us (by far my favorite skill - even though his kisses are a bit sloppy :) ). We ask him where his doggies are and he'll point right to them. He knows the word "no" but cleverly ignores it when he wants to (how young they start!)

Brody's favorite activities these days are: playing catch with his doggies (although he does get upset when they run off with the ball and don't come back), playing with shape-sorters, dancing and playing with blocks. He giggles constantly and I can't get enough of it.

In the last month...

Brody has started eating solids:

Been swimming:

Started sitting unsupported (he cannot pull himself up yet, but will stay sitting for quite awhile!):

Got an exersaucer:

Started playing in a jumper:

He's also had multiple runny noses, fevers, two ear infections, a sinus infection, hives, rounds of antibiotics and passed all sorts of germs around the house! So between the doctor appointments, busy summer activities and my busy work schedule, things have been a bit quiet on here. If not sooner, I'll definitely be back to posting more regularly in the fall!

You know you're a working mom when...

Your laptop bag holds not only a laptop and paperwork, but also a onsie, baby pants, a thermometer and a bib.

It's a glamorous life I lead.

Where's my baby?

These days, I'm starting to wonder if I even have a child?! If it weren't for onsite daycare, I'd never get to see Brody.

Last night I didn't get home from work until 7:15. I was so sad that I missed the evening with him. When I got home he was still in his carseat, sound asleep.

Brody still isn't napping well at daycare. So he's started a pattern of falling asleep on the car ride home. He'll then sleep until 7pm when we wake him up for bath/bottle/bed. After about 45 minutes of time with him, he's down for the night again.

While this means that I really don't miss anything when I work late and yes, we get more time to get stuff done around the house. But I really miss my baby!

My morning drop offs now include more playtime (and thus getting up to my desk later) and my daycare lunch break is getting longer as well. I definitely can't wait for the weekend when I can have him all day!

Working mom

I thought I had a busy life -- until we had Brody. I know it's only the beginning (I'm sure the days of sports practices and after school activities will be even worse!)

Here is what my days look like. This is on a good day, which means Jason is actually home at night (he coaches/bowls some nights during the week) and I only work until 5:30. When I work late, it just means less playtime with Brody.

Mornings
5:15 wake up/shower/get ready
5:30 Jason wakes up/showers/gets ready
5:45 whoever gets downstairs first takes dogs outside, feeds them and warms Brody's bottle
6:00 Jason wakes Brody & feeds him, while I pick out his outfit and put together my lunch
6:20 Jason leaves for work, if Brody hasn't been dressed, I dress him
6:30 Pack up everything for daycare/work & take the dogs outside again
6:45-7:30 leave house, drop off / playtime at daycare.

Days
7:30-5:30 work (on a good day)

Nights
5:45-7:30 Playtime (if Brody isn't napping) and dinner
7:30-8:30 Bedtime routine (bath, bottle, rocking)
8:30-9:00 Make bottles for the next day
9:00 E-mail, blog, watch TV, spend time with Jason, or just fall asleep early!

1st week at daycare

The time has come for me to return to work. So along with Brody's 12 week birthday came his first day at daycare. He started on a Wednesday in order to ease myself back to work and him into his new surroundings. So his first week was only 3 days long.

So far? It's been great! We went back and forth between two day cares but once we found out that my company daycare had an opening in April, we took it. I couldn't be happier with our decision. I am very lucky to have daycare located on site which is about a 2 minute walk from my desk. Originally I didn't think I'd take advantage of the open-door visiting policy that often. So far, I've found myself making time for at least a 10 minute mid-day trip to see Brody. I also spend about 15-30 minutes playing with Brody in the morning before I head up to my desk.

There are two primary teachers in Brody's room with 8 babies under the age of 1. There are several support teachers who help out during their lunch breaks and before/after his teachers get in for the day. They have both been very good with Brody and helpful to us as parents. They are constantly telling us how strong he is for his age and one teacher commented that she can foresee him starting to walk early (we've had the same thoughts since he seems so active, but only time will tell). The teachers send e-mail updates along with pictures they've taken of Brody during the day. All of his pictures included in here have been taken at daycare. As you can see, he seems very happy.

Another positive aspect is that in only 3 days we can see that Brody is already loving his new friends. When I am there I have noticed that he smiles at the other kids a lot and is constantly observing them. When I have held him in a "standing" position, he starts to move his legs like he wants to run over to the other kids. The teachers also sent us a picture of Brody holding hands with another boy in the class! (The picture is so adorable, but for the privacy of the other child, I am not including it in here). I believe that all this interaction with kids that are slightly older than him will help him learn faster.

The only downfall (and my biggest fear) is that he supposedly rolled over for the first time at daycare. Now, I do say "supposedly" because I don't think anyone actually saw him roll over. His teacher set him down on his tummy for tummy-time, turned around and when she looked back at him, he was on his back! No one has seen a repeat performance since. He's a little young to actually roll over, so I think that she may have set him down in a way that made it easy for him to flip.

Overall we're having a positive experience with him in daycare and I think he is handling the new routine very well. I, of course, am having to adjust a lot as well as a new working mother...but I'll post more about that later.